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Lovers and Other Tanners
Lovers and Other Tanners is episode five in season six of Full House. It originally aired on October 20, 1992. Opening Teaser We find Michelle in her room, planting seeds for school, using milk cartons. Stephanie comes in and sees that there are broccoli, tomato, and pea seeds. Michelle then gets creative and decides to use some Plain/Milk Chocolate M&M's for what she calls "Dessert" seeds, to which Stephanie compares to planting a nickel and building a money tree. Heeding those words, Michelle gets another milk carton and fills it by dumping out all her piggy bank money. Plot Summary Danny has plans to pick up Vicky from the airport, so he asks D.J. to pick up Michelle from a Honeybee troop meeting at 4:00 pm. In the mean time, D.J. studies with Steve Hale. When they are studying, the two realize they have fallen in love. Minutes later, Danny walks in with Vicky while D.J. and Steve are sharing a kiss and he interrupts them. Stephanie arrives shortly after with Michelle because D.J. accidentally forgot to pick her up. Danny is furious and Steve decides to leave to go to wrestling practice. As soon as he leaves, Danny unleashes on D.J., telling her that recently, she has been entirely too wrapped up with Steve (her grades are slipping at school/she forgets her priorities at home). D.J. explains that she loves Steve and he loves her. This makes Danny even angrier, saying that she’s only fifteen and not old enough to know what love is. Feeling like her dad is not even trying to understand, D.J. snaps back, saying Danny has no right to tell her what or how to feel and who she can or can’t have those feelings for (stating it’s like her telling him that he can’t like or be with Vicky). Danny completely ignores her reason and says that all he knows is that her head has been in the clouds ever since she started dating Steve, and out of concern for his daughter’s safety, forbids her from seeing him again. However, this blows up in his face when D.J. defiantly stands her ground, firmly telling Danny that she will see Steve "whenever she wants" and he can’t do anything to stop it as he has been rubbing too much salt to her emotional wounds. She then bolts out of the house to find Steve, much to Danny’s shock, horror, dismay and devastation. Danny heads to the high school where Steve’s wrestling practice is and tries to talk to him, but the only way he can get close enough is to take Steve’s wrestling partner’s place. As they wrestle, Danny tells him what has been going on. D.J. arrives and is horrified, shocked, dismayed, and even devastated to find the two wrestling. Danny says that he was worried about her and demands that she come home. She refuses, telling him that she's not going anywhere with him until he stops trying to control her and stops trying to add any more salt to her emotional wounds. A new fight almost breaks out between the two, but Steve stops them. He then sadly tells D.J. that even though he loves her, he can’t see her anymore because he does not want to come between her and her father. He kisses her and sadly walks away, leaving D.J. heartbroken, humiliated, aggravated, emotionally distressed, and devastated because of the scene her dad created in front of her classmates by wrestling Steve. Danny tries to comfort D.J., saying he is only doing what he thinks is best and that she will understand that he was right when she is older. However, tempers flare yet again, her boiling point reaches its full potential, and her pain immediately turns to anger, devastation, aggravation, and emotional distress to the point where she lashes out at him and explodes, literally blowing up in his face in the same way he blew up in hers, and lectures him by stating that she does not need to be older to see things clearly because she can. She also tells him that he is acting like a complete control freak as he is unfair, selfish and only cares about having his way and adding salt to people's emotional wounds, with no regards for the or emotions feelings of others. She goes on to say that he better be happy that he got what he wanted and to be happy he added more salt to her emotional wounds, because, as far as she’s concerned, those wounds have gotten worse and he is no longer part of her life anymore; with that, she ends her lecture and hurts his feelings by telling him to stay away from her and to leave her alone before storming off in tears, leaving behind a hurt, devastated, emotionally distressed, and an even more distraught Danny. Back home, D.J. lives up to her word and completely alienates Danny out of her life. Sitting outside that night, a very depressed and still emotionally distressed and devastated and distraught Danny does not know what to do; he has realized that, instead of improving or even solving what he thought was a problem, he made everything even worse than it already was, and, instead of fanning its flames, he added even more fuel to an already burning, growing, and even spreading out-of-control fire that he has possibly made too difficult to extinguish, and even worse yet, has possibly put his relationship with D.J. in extreme jeopardy, possibly damaged it to the point where it is damaged beyond repair, and possibly brought it to the brink of despair and even to the point of no return, and possibly added even more salt to D.J.'s emotional wounds, and possibly even vice versa on all counts. Vicky comes outside to comfort him and as they talk, the two realize that they are in love with each other as well when Danny suddenly kisses her. He comments that he hasn’t felt like this with anyone since he lost Pam and that he had forgotten what it felt like. This makes him realizes that D.J. and Steve really do love with each other, and that he was wrong to take something that special away from his daughter. Danny then goes to D.J.'s room and talks to her, where this time, calmer heads prevail. He apologizes for his behavior, saying that he was being unfair when he should have been trying to hear her out, and tells her that she can see Steve again, much to her joy. He also says that while he’s happy that Steve is an important part of her life now, he drops the bombshell and says she can’t forget about her priorities at home and her grades. D.J. apologizes too, saying she was extremely confused by the feelings she was having, and compares it to all her emotions trying to come out at the same time. Danny laughs, saying he knows that same feeling, and they both hug. Meanwhile, at KFLH, Jesse and Joey debut their new afternoon radio show, which is entitled the "Rush Hour Renegades". However, Jesse has a hard time because of a bad head cold, and ends up sleeping through most of the broadcast, as he took four cold pills (more than the average) to help his stuffed nose and the pills made him drowsy. Trivia The episode title is a take on the title of the 1970 comedy film (based on a play) Lovers and Other Strangers. Quotes (In the teaser, we find Michelle in her room with milk cartons and plants. Stephanie comes in.) Stephanie: Hi, Michelle. What are you doing? Michelle: I'm planting my seeds for school. Stephanie: (reading the labels) Peas, tomatoes and broccoli. Michelle: I'm also planting dessert. (She takes some Plain/Milk Chocolate M&M's and puts them in an empty milk carton.) Stephanie: M&M's? Michelle, that's like planting a nickel and growing a money tree. (she leaves) Michelle: Good idea. (Michelle takes out her piggy bank and empties it into another milk carton...) ---- Steve: You make me crazy, D.J.! I love you! D.J.: You do? ---- D.J.: I love Steve, and he loves me. Danny: What?! You’re 15 years old! You’re not in love! D.J.: You don’t know how I feel! Danny: I know that your head has been in the clouds. You haven’t been paying any attention to your schoolwork, and you've been neglecting all your responsibilities, like picking up your little sister. D.J.: I said I was sorry. Danny: Well, I’m sorry, too — because I don’t want you and Steve seeing each other anymore. D.J.: You can’t do that! Danny: I just did. D.J.: Well, I don’t care. Because I’m gonna see Steve whenever I want and you can’t stop me. (exits) ---- D.J.: (to Danny) All you care about is humiliating me. Danny: Hey, we’ll talk about this at home, OK? After my lungs re-inflate. D.J.: I’m not going home. I’ll stay at Kimmy’s. Kimmy: You might want to rethink that, Deej. My father just ran out of foot deodorant. Category:Episodes Category:Season 6 Category:Quotes Category:Trivia